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Archive for March 3, 2021

March 3, 2021 — Extreme tubing (for me)

I have accomplished a lot during my time on this earth. I have visited London, Paris, Madrid, and Venice during a backpack trip to Europe, I have degrees from the two highest-ranked universities in their particular fields of endeavor, shaken the hands of Charles Barkley and Shaquille O’Neal, driven 105 miles an hour in a police car, and have started up and maintained this website for two decades.

And I can’t cook a potato.

Nope, I’ve been completely unable to bake, fry, poach, boil, microwave, or otherwise apply the correct amount of heat in order to make a potato into its edible state.

It’s been a considerable source of frustration for me through my adult life. Yes, I can get whatever starch I need from microwaveable rice, putting bread in a toaster, or heading up already-cooked potato products (such as steak fries and tater tots) in the air fryer.

But last week, I ran across a bag of new potatoes in the area where day-old produce was laid out for quick sale. I figured it was worth the time and the risk to make one more go of it. Only this time, I had a secret weapon.

For it was a couple of Christmases ago that I received one of those cloth microwaveable bags (which are invariably red in color) that claims to be able to hold potatoes while you microwave the contents for four minutes, and the inside will come out perfectly every time.

I filled the bag with about eight small potatoes, and did so with a bit of apprehension. What if the recommended time frame was too much for the small potatoes, and was instead meant for larger tubers? What if enough microwaves bombarded the contents of the bag? Would they burn from the inside?

I carefully did the cooking in two stages, per the instructions on the bag. Putting the potato bag on the rotating plate in the oven, I ran the microwaves for two minutes, then flipped the bag over again for two more minutes.

To my amazement, when I removed the potatoes from the bag, they were cooked. No mushies, no dry patches, nothing amiss whatsoever.

It’s a new day.